Child Custody And Divorce: Free Legal Advice
- - - - - - - - - -
Good! Now you're going to get some good advice, now you're going to embark on some good strategy, and now you're going to do what YOU ought to do, in YOUR particular case, based upon professional advice which is tailored to the facts of YOUR case. And believe me, there isn't any way that a well-written book, or well-written web page, can generalize about things, and fit your situation. Your attorney is going to tailor the advice for YOU. That's exactly what you need right now.
[Q: So what should I say when I get to my attorney's office?]
Whatever she, or he, wants to know. Whatver you care to say. Your first appointment is kind of a get-to-know-you session, where you get a feel for your attorney, how that attorney handles cases, what that attorney thinks about different aspects of the case, and things very much like that. The attorney will need certain facts from you: the full names of the parties, the full names of the children, your respective addresses, where everybody works, whether or not there is a pension, or a stock sharing program, whether or not domestic abuse is going to be an issue, whether or not child custody is going to be an issue, and all KINDS of things that I don't really have time to get into here....
You'll be there between an hour and two hours. Your attorney is experienced enough to figure out what needs to be asked, experienced enough to answer your questions, experienced enough to advise you what needs to be done, and what very definitely needs NOT to be done, and, to the extent that you don't know (and I've got news for you: you don't know. That's why you're here), explain what's going on, and going to be going on, in this case. Oh, and answer your questions. Would you PLEASE ask that series of twenty questions that you really want answered? This is NOT the time to be shy. The time has been set aside, the lawyer is waiting, you've even lost sleep over what your brother Marvin has told you. Now ASK. Go ahead. ASK THE QUESTIONS.
Do you know what's going to happen if you don't ask the questions?
You're going to continue to lose sleep, you're going to continue to worry yourself into a frazzle, and finally, after you've paid WAY too high a price in stress (Remember stress? We started out talking about stress...), you are going to screw up your courage, and call the attorney, with the specific aim of asking those questions. The attorney won't be in. She's at court. She's busy with a client. No answer for you....stew on it. NO, let's do it the right way. If you have questions, ask the questions at that first appointment. It's a very good time to do so. So do it.
Oh, and if you DO ask the question, or questions? Why, you get the answer(s). Right now. No more stress. Good advice. ACCURATE answers, from a professional in the field. Not rumors, like brother Marvin. Think about it.
OK, enough of that. You get the point. After you have answers to the questions, and after you have answered a few questions, you need to stop right here and THINK about what's going on here. You have met a new person, one who is going to be your lawyer, and know most of your secrets (if they're relevant to your case, otherwise not), and you are going to trust this person to do the very best for you.
This is where you need to THINK. REALLY. RIGHT NOW.
You need to make the decision as to whether or not you want to hire this person to take on this job. Trust your instincts. You've met a lot of people in your life, and you've made a lot of 'people judgments', and you've been right and wrong, and you learned from it. Apply that knowledge right now. Your lawyer should be basically your 'type' of person, one that you trust, one that you can tolerate (if not enjoy) talking to, a person that you TRUST to make important decisions on your behalf. If that trust isn't there, if the chemistry just isn't right, GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE. There must be dozens of lawyers in the phone book, you must have several names on your list, and, if that chemistry isn't right, if you're not comfortable, it's time to go interview someone else. Announce that you'll call back when you're ready to proceed, and leave. Go see someone else. You'll know, after interviewing three lawyers, which one is most like you, which one handles problems the way you do, which one you trust. THEN you call that one back, and go in and get your papers signed, and you have a little more trust, because you've met two others, who are idiots. You want this guy. So fine, then do it. It took me two years to find a barber, after my regular barber retired. You can relate to that, you've done it. Barber, beautician, plumber, babysitter, whatever. The first one interviewed isn't necessarily the best. So fix it. Do another interview.
["You know, Harry, about that lawyer you referred me to: Ol' Jim is a pretty nice guy, we talked for an hour or so, and he really made this stuff bearable, we're gonna get this worked out..."]
Well, now, thank you. Really. And I don't speak for 'all' of us lawyers very often, but in this one little paragraph, I think I do. We all appreciate getting to know a new client, we all appreciate being able to make a difference, being able to say to ourselves (we really don't talk to other people: we're not allowed to, and we don't want to. Confidentiality, you know.) "Well, it went well today. Charlene got a good result, and we got her the house, which she deserved". I love this job.
Or, I suppose, some other lawyer (Larry), with some different job(tax lawyer), says to himself "Well, we got a good result today. Internal Revenue Section 6554 has no application to trusts established by the testamentary document if the document was witnessed by independent means, and therefore the adjusted basis gets carried forward as it was carried on the books of the closely-held corporation." And he loves his job, too (can you believe it?). And we talk, often. Sure. He yells, in the parking lot, "Hey, Jim, how's it goin?", and I yell back, "Fine. How's it with you"?
Good luck with it.